When Julie's birthday rolled around, I told her that I'd bring cupcakes to school for her friends and that we'd have a family party with cake and ice cream and presents. Then I asked her if she also wanted all her school friends to come to our house for a kid party. She said, "No, I want all my friends to stay at they [sic] own houses." Believe me, I didn't need to be persuaded not to have to rent a long, low table and a dozen tiny chairs, buy more cake and ice cream, invent 90 minutes' worth of games and activities and crafts, fill goody bags, and then watch Julie glaze over as she opens up present after present while I'm trying to get ground-in frosting out of the carpet. No party? Fine with me.
Julie's teachers tell me that she plays very happily at school both alone and with other kids. She doesn't seem to care much whether or which kids are playing; she just does whatever activity she wants. If someone else is there, she'll play with that kid, regardless of who it is; if not, she'll play alone. She tells me about the various kids and speaks positively about most of them, but she doesn't seem to have any interest in really making friends. She's been invited on playdates a couple of times, but I could tell she didn't really want to go, so we didn't. In fact, the only playdates she's had have been with girls in the neighborhood, all of whom are a year older than she is. So I guess she is just taking her time getting into the social thing at school.
Really, think about it - how many best friends do we remember from when were young? There may be a person or two you liked but you're lucky to get out of elementary school with one or two life-long friends. I don't blame her for disliking "playdates." I dislike them too. Plus, she has siblings to roll around with. I think she sounds like my kind of girl!
Posted by: Liz | October 20, 2005 at 10:35 PM