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September 19, 2007



Unsolicited advice...since your daughter is still young, it may be a few years before this surfaces, but maybe you will remember this. When three girls get together and play it will invariably lead to the two against one dynamic leaving one girl miserable.

It's a REALLY good idea to talk to the other parents BEFORE this happens about how to deal with it...because if you are all consistent, it works. If one parent tries to intervene, one ignores and the other makes cookies, the kids don't learn a thing...except that they want to play at the cookie mom's house more.

We had three families involved where the three girls played together and we all did the same thing. As soon as one came complaining about the two against one thing, we got all three girls together and told them they had 10 minutes to work it out or everyone goes home. I know that doesn't work if you are watching someone else's kid and the parents aren't home to send them to. But it never got to that anyway.

I remember doing this when my daughter was about 8...and I did it just a couple of months ago when there was a sleepover of 6 girls at my house and one girl was being taunted/tortured...whatever it is that middle school girls do to each other. I told all 6 girls that I would drive every single one of them to their respective homes unless they worked it out in 10 minutes. They did and all was well.


Oh...and I just can't seem to stop commenting. I'm kind of being rebellious this morning and committing myself to blog reading instead of all the things I SHOULD be doing. I felt kind of guilty when the working parents picked up the kids for carpool this morning and I was in my PJ's.

Anyway...my son and his friend go back and forth between our houses all the time. We leave ours with them when we go out of town and vice versa. We have gotten to the point where when we get a new insurance card, we photocopy it and give it to the other family. Their kid broke his arm in my garage. My son put his hand through a window at theirs. The list goes on. It's become quite the joke as to whose turn it is next.


She's my youngest, so I've already had experience with three-way playdates with my older kids! No real problems so far, although
one time Pete was on a three-way playdate that turned slightly sour -- the host mom handled it with aplomb!

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