verbatim

Not Exactly As We'd Planned

Yesterday I spent all day getting ready for our weekend up in the mountains with friends. Because Julie had been home sick (cold, cough, and fever) from school on Wednesday and Thursday, I had a ton of errands to run—Petco to get cat food, CVS for Children's Tylenol, Blockbuster to return the kids' overdue movies, Whole Foods to pick up apples and bananas, the bank, and the post office. I also had a phone appointment with one of Steph's teachers. In between all of this, I did two loads of laundry, ran the dishwasher, packed up suitcases for me, Pete, and Julie (and supervised Steph's), made a kugel, and made sandwiches for the kids for the ride up (Andy and I planned to get burritos at Dos Amigos in Concord). Phew!

Andy got home early and packed up his stuff, and we got on the road at about 4:40. Normally it takes us just over 2.5 hours to go the 150 miles (it's all highway), including a pit stop or two. Not surprisingly, though, we hit a fair amount of rush hour and weekend traffic, and the rain slowed things down even more. We were all irritable by the time we got up there at about 8:00, and Pete was complaining that he didn't feel well. I honestly just assumed that he was tired and grouchy.

Fast forward to about 11:00, when I woke up and said to Andy, "I just heard a big SPLASH!" At the same instant, I heard Pete at our doorway saying, "Mom?" I had only a nanosecond to think, "Isn't that odd that Pete happens to be needing me for something at the same second that I woke up to a strange SPLASH sound!" The next nanosecond I realized that he had puked everywhere—he couldn't even make it to the bathroom.

Our friends had plans they couldn't change for last night, so they were intending to get an early start first thing this morning and meet us at the mountain. We called them right away and told them to turn off their alarm clock. That was the only saving grace—that they didn't drive up all the way up only to have their weekend ruined too!

This morning Pete felt better, not pukey but still not 100%. Andy was going to take the girls to the mountain for a few runs, but it had rained all night and then turned quite cold, so there was a layer of ice on everything. He called the mountain and was told that only a few trails were open, although they hoped to open the rest later. We decided to bag the whole idea and just head home.

So here we are. How's your weekend going?

Friday iPod Random Ten

1. Animal Song - Martin Sexton
2. Blue Yodel #1 (T for Texas) - Bob Dylan & Johnny Cash 
3. Silver Wings - Marshall Crenshaw
4. Passionate Kisses - Mary-Chapin Carpenter
5. Anchorage - Michelle Shocked
6. Blue Eyes - Uncle Tupelo
7. Day - Bill Callahan
8. In State - Kathleen Edwards
9. Across the Universe - Rufus Wainwright
10. Midnight Jam - Joe Strummer & The Mescalaros

Got the Bug?

You know how Google has that flu-tracking thing? Apparently it has recognized outbreaks two weeks sooner than even the Centers for Disease Control. Well, I have a similar tool right here on Verbatim. As soon as I posted the obligatory "Is this thing on?" blog post on March 8, 2004, I wasted no time in posting a humorous (dark humor, but humor nonetheless) piece about the good ol' 24-hour stomach bug that was currently laying waste to poor Steph, then age 7 (Julie's current age! ACK!). That post has generated more traffic via Google search than any other in my 5 years of blogging. My hard-working staff of statisticians tell me that yesterday alone, I got 4 hits on that post, and 7 the day before (and 7 already today, with 5 hours still to go in this time zone). I think the CDC should put some of their best people and their fancy-shmancy computer epidemiology simulation programs on the case. They could easily track who's Googling "24-hour stomach bug" and where they're located, and then ... what? Buy them some ginger ale and saltines? Offer to do their laundry? Never mind.

The Cat in the Cat in the Hat Box

I asked the fine folks at Twitter for some suggestions for a LOLcat caption for this photo:

And the winner is ...

That came from the clever @Jenn1ferJun1per. I submitted it to ICanHasCheezburger; we'll see if they choose it!

Hayes Carll

I have to thank Verbatim reader Wendy for turning me on to the music of Hayes Carll. His CD Trouble in Mind has been in frequent rotation in my iTunes library ever since I got it several months back. Carll's sense of humor shines through in his wry, ironic lyrics, and his twangy drawl is a pleasure to listen to. If you like Texas-style alt-country music, you'll love this CD.

I hope you're all familiar with the many free, legal downloads available at Largehearted Boy's site; he's got a whole load of live Hayes Carll tracks that are yours for the taking. I was delighted to come across Carll's version of one of my favorite old Bill Morrissey songs, "Morrissey Falls in Love at First Sight." As you might have suspected from the title, I wouldn't have thought this particular song would lend itself to being covered, but I was wrong—it's great.

Consider Yourself Notified

There's an easy new way to find out if I've written a new blog post: I've added a little email subscription thingy to the sidebar, near the bottom there. Just plug in your email address and you'll be notified whenever I get creative.

Or, you can subscribe to this blog's RSS feed (that link is in the sidebar too) if you use a feed aggregator like Bloglines or Google Reader.

I also have a Note pop up on Facebook whenever I post something here.

Beyond that, you can just keep this page open all day and hit refresh every 10 minutes or so.

Work Notes

1. I mentioned last year that one of my biggest clients was bought by another company. This new company turns out to be not so good about paying their outside contractors. I just today received a check for two invoices I submitted in November and December, and that was after a lot of phone calls and emails. Man, I hate chasing money. (The only thing worse than chasing money is chasing work. Such is the life of the freelancer.)

2. A new client asked me to edit a fiction manuscript, despite my protestations that I'd never worked on fiction. This is one of those services that helps aspiring authors self-publish their work. Oh. My. God. Short of a total rewrite, there was little I could do to save this manuscript. It was so poorly written I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. The story itself was quite good, but I doubt anyone will ever read it unless they're being paid to, as I was. I cleaned it up as best I could, but pee-yoo, it still stinks.

3. When I reply to blind ads on Craigslist for freelance work, I usually begin my emails with "To whom it may concern." Yesterday I asked on Twitter whether that's what others do, or whether anyone prefers "Dear Sir or Madam" (or something else) in the absence of an actual name or job title to use. Before I hit the ol' tweet button, I double-checked my spelling of "Madam" over "Madame." I consulted my two favorite dictionaries, and they confirmed that "Madam" is preferred in English usage to address a woman, whereas "Madame" is used before a French name. (Both give "Madam" as a secondary definition for "Madame," though, so it's not exactly wrong.) Anyhow, today I was at Andy's office wearing my bookkeeping hat, and out of the blue his sales rep asked me, "If I'm beginning a letter with 'Dear Sir or Madam,' is there an e on the end of 'Madam'?" And how do you like that, I had the answer right on the tip of my tongue.

4. My next two big projects are both late in coming to me, so I currently have nothing on my plate. I have a feeling they'll show up simultaneously and still be due back by their original deadlines, so for now, I'm enjoying the opportunity to relax a bit and catch up on reading and errands and family/household stuff.

Better Than Average

Yesterday Andy and I tried to count up all the weddings we've attended in our 22+ years together. We came up with 24, of which 5 have ended in divorce (so far). That comes out to something like a 20% divorce rate, considerably better than the infamous 50% figure we always hear about. So: If you want to have a long, happy marriage, consider inviting me and Andy to the wedding. I can't guarantee anything, but our record is pretty darn good.

And the Oscar for Fewest Movies Seen Goes to...

...me! This is yet another in a pitifully long line of Oscar award shows that I'm not prepared for. It's hard to believe that Andy and I used to be the ones who'd seen every movie anyone had ever heard of. Alas, here's the very short list of nominated movies I've seen (big categories only):

• "The Dark Knight" - Best Supporting Actor (Heath Ledger): You may recall that I was thoroughly disappointed with this movie. I imagine they'll give the award to Ledger because he's dead and all.
• "Frozen River" - Best Actress (Melissa Leo): I would love it if she won this award! This was a tiny movie, but she was outstanding.
• "Kung Fu Panda" - Best Animated Film. That was Pete's birthday party movie last year. It was very enjoyable.
• "Slumdog Millionaire" - Best Picture.* As you know, I thought this was a tremendously well-done movie.

*Isn't it curious that they say "Best Picture" instead of "Best Movie" or "Best Film"? Sounds like something my Dad would say: "Wow, what a picture!" or "Now, that was a picture!"

Buffet Style

One of the main reasons we don't do more things as a family is that it's really hard to come up with activities that appeal to two girls and one boy between the ages of 7 and 12. (Well, in truth, Julie is pretty easy to please; Steph and Pete are the ones who can never agree.) Pete doesn't do girly movies, and Steph doesn't do scary ones. Pete likes to be active; Steph doesn't. We even have to alternate pizza places when we order out, because they disagree on that too—Steph's favorite is Bill's, and Pete's is 4-Corners. (For those of you who think that "4-Corners" is a strange name for a pizza place, it's the name of the busy intersection where the shop is located, not a description of the shape of the pizza.) Julie's favorite kind of pizza is next-day leftovers, regardless of where it came from. Go figure.

Today the girls wanted to the go to the aquarium, but Pete didn't—and it ends up costing about $100 when all is said and done, so we don't go unless everyone is jazzed about the idea. Same goes for the Museum of Science. (We used to have memberships at both, but we don't go often enough to make that worthwhile anymore.) There was talk of bowling, or skating, or rock-climbing, or going to the mall, or a million other things, but no consensus could be reached.

Even a simple, "Why don't we go out to lunch?" was met with endless discussion. We finally decided on Minado, a ginormous all-you-can-eat Japanese buffet place in Natick that only Andy had been to. But Pete was not happy about this; he had his heart set on pancakes. It seemed kind of dumb to drag a kid to an all-you-can-eat place if he doesn't want to eat anything, so he and Andy went to Joan and Ed's (in the same strip mall) for pancakes, while the girls and I went to Minado. (For the record, the girls like Joan and Ed's too, but they had gotten excited about the idea of Minado and wouldn't be dissuaded.)

Wow. Minado is huge, with row after row of buffet tables containing every possible Japanese delicacy you can imagine, including tons of seafood. There was everything from fried rice to shrimp tempura to beef teriyaki to pork gyoza and on and on.... Then there's a whole line of sushi guys making all kinds of things for people who like sushi (not us), and I'm told it's some of the very best-quality sushi around.

I told the girls that they should take a little bit of anything that looked interesting, because they could just taste it and not worry about whether they didn't like it. And they did! I was very impressed that my picky eaters were trying crab cakes and yam tempura and cucumber-sesame salad! And, indeed, one bite was enough of some things, but they went back for seconds on plenty of others. As for me, I loved everything I tried.

For dessert, they offer a buffet of Jell-o cubes, melon slices, petit-fours, and tiny cups of vanilla or green tea soft-serve ice cream. Sometimes just a few bites of something cold and refreshing is all I want after a meal, so I think this is a great idea.

It's not cheap (lunch price is $20 for adults and $10 for kids over 4' tall), but it was very filling, and it's a great way to get kids (and adults!) to try new things without committing to a plateful of something potentially icky.

I wish there were other good buffet-style restaurants around. Many years ago, I visited a friend in California; I went with her family to a kid-friendly chain restaurant that offered lots of salads and pasta dishes—I can't recall the name, but it's a great idea. I wonder why buffet restaurants aren't more common—I would think that they would be cheaper and easier to operate than regular restaurants. Anyone know?

Silly Saturday Stuff

1. GOP Problem-Solver. Try it out.

2. ЯOLcats have come! They're English translations of Eastern-bloc LOLcats, of course. For instance:

3. If you don't think I'm making my own bacon one of these days (whether lamb or pork), think again. (And butter, too, for that matter.)

4.  The Harper's Index is celebrating its 25th anniversary by becoming searchable! I apologize in advance for causing you to lose the next 4 hours of productivity.

Friday iPod Random Ten

1. Hasten Down the Wind (live) - Jackson Browne & Warren Zevon  
2. Blue Umbrella - John Prine
3. Rain and Snow - The Be Good Tanyas 
4. You Can't Always Get What You Want - The Rolling Stones
5. Long Black Veil (live) - Dave Matthews & Emmylou Harris
6. Boogie On Reggae Woman - Stevie Wonder 
7. Pony - Sam Baker
8. Coyote - Joni Mitchell & The Band
9. Speed of the Sound of Loneliness - Nanci Griffith
10. Is That Love - Squeeze

Kids' Movies

It's school vacation week here in Verbatimland, and yesterday I said to the kids, "What should we do today?" Little did I know they'd chant in unison, "Go see Pink Panther 2!" Oy. It's too late for me, but you can save yourselves: Don't go see this! If your spouse owes you one, cash in that chit! Trust me on this. Particularly if you admire Steve Martin as a comic genius, because this is a criminal waste of his considerable talents. Add to that a corset full of gratuitous sexual references that were wasted on everyone (kids didn't get 'em, adults didn't laugh at 'em) and Lily Tomlin in a role clearly written-in at the last minute, and you've got the Hindenburg of comedies. I think the agents for Andy Garcia, Alfred Molina, and Jeremy Irons have some splainin' to do.

Today Steph went to see "Confessions of a Shopaholic" with a friend. Yes, I dropped them off at the cinema and picked them up 2 hours later. This, my friends, is the glory and the beauty of the older child. It's also what allowed me to escape the horror of "Paul Blart: Mall Cop" last month. Twice.

Now Hear This

I have used my iPhone's headset exactly twice, ever. Why? Because the earbuds (ick, I will never get used to that word) are too big to fit in my delicate flower-like ears. I never bothered using any of the other earbuds I own (none of which fit all that great either, to be frank), because they don't have a built-in microphone and control button located right on the cord. That's so if you're listening to music and a phone call comes in, the music fades and you can answer the phone with just a click of the button—handy especially if the iPhone itself is in your pocket. Anyhow, Andy used his headset so often that it finally died, so I gave him mine and have just gone without. At one point I did research buying a new headset, but I found the choices overwhelming and the pricetags kinda high, especially since I didn't know how well any of them would fit.

So imagine my delight when I got an email last week saying that I was a winner in the MomCentral Valentine's Giveaway. And you'll never guess what I won! A crockpot! No, just kidding, I won these awesome Vibe II headphones from V-Moda! They have all the features of the ones that came with the iPhone, but they have tiny little earbuds with 4 different sizes of silicone "ear fittings" (in both black and clear), plus a nifty pair of "sport earhooks" that you can use if you're exercising and don't want the earbuds to fly out of your ears. Oh, and a cute little carrying pouch.

The sound is awesome, the fit is perfect, the controls are convenient, and I'm a muy happy camper. Thanks, MomCentral and V-Moda!

6 Things About 25 Things

For a few weeks last month, I was afraid to get out of bed, because I knew that someone would be nagging tagging me to do that "25 Random Things About Me" meme going around on Facebook. The reasons I had no intention of doing it included these:

1. Anyone who's been blogging for a few years has already done a million versions of this. I can't think of anything "random" about me that I haven't already put into a list of some sort.
2. If you know me in real life (a category that encompasses nearly all of my Facebook "friends") or have read my blog for any length of time (which takes care of just about everyone else), there's little you don't know about me. I'm pretty much an open book, in case you hadn't noticed.
3. I have an aversion to doing "what everyone else is doing," just on principle.

My first idea was to wait until 25 people tagged me and then just post a list of those 25 people, but the number never got quite that high (it just seemed that way). Then I thought maybe I'd post 25 spoofs of the meme; I still don't have 25, but this ought to get you started:

1. James posted "25 Things Not About Me." Wow, I can't believe his car isn't messy!
2. Someone named Linus posted this clever list; you should be able to get through it all.
3. I love all the self-referential touches in this one. Very meta.
4. Here's a list of "25 Things I Didn't Want to Know About You," a compilation of items from other people's lists. For instance: "I have been pooped on by a monkey." Ewww.
5. One of my favorites is this list composed by Microsoft Windows 7.
6. And, finally, an article in the Times about this scourge.

Four Quick Links

1. This just in: "Abstinence education programs are unrealistic." — Bristol Palin

2. Here's Barack Obama's signature carved (written?) inside the drawer of his former desk in the Senate. I couldn't make out Bobby Kennedy's, though—can you?

3. Adjustable heat hot sauce! Now that's clever.

4. The Croc-o-dial is a cell phone holder from Crocs.

Glad It's Over

As you know, I'm not allowed to blog about Steph anymore, but she authorized me to say that she had "a procedure" today at the hospital, and it went well. All of the nurses and other personnel were wonderful.

There's a new profession out there called "Child Life Specialist." (Well, new to me, anyhow—I had to Google it when I got home.) This person's job is to make a child who's at the hospital for a procedure or surgery or extended stay or whatever just a little more comfortable and relaxed. Ours explained to Steph what would be happening, offered to fetch magazines and videos, told bad jokes, and just chatted with her to reduce anxiety and fearfulness. What a wonderful addition to the pediatric staff.

The prep for this particular procedure included fasting from Sunday night until she got home at noon today, and also some yucky medicine yesterday. Steph was such a trouper about all of it. She was braver and more cheerful than most adults would be in that situation (myself included).

As a parent, I'll just say that there is nothing like waiting for your kid to wake up from anesthesia—time just stands still. I sat in the waiting room the whole time, robotically playing solitaire on my iPhone. Andy paced. And walked. And strode. And then paced some more. What a relief to finally see Steph wheeled back in, flickering her eyelids and trying to speak.

The Long-Overdue Facebook Post

For quite a few weeks now, I've been mentally composing a blog post about Facebook. As you may recall, in November I finally succumbed to peer pressure and joined. As much as I dislike nearly everything about it, it does seem to be the place to find (and be found by) old friends and colleagues. With my 25th (!!) college reunion coming up this spring, as well as my camp's 70th reunion fest, all I kept hearing was "Check out all the updates on Facebook." In truth, via Facebook I've gotten back in touch with some people from my past whom I might not have found (or even thought to look for) without it. But beyond that, it's not for me.

As far as I can tell, here are the things that people do on Facebook:
1. Post status updates. These one-liners are exactly what Twitter is all about, and I greatly prefer Twitter because it's easier to have a conversation with many people at once and to "follow" people you don't really know without committing to "friending" them.
2. Post photos, notes, web links, and so on. I do all of this right here at Verbatim! It's one-stop shopping for all things Karen!
3. Play Scrabble or other games with their friends. I imagine this would be fun, but I can't really be bothered to find a game that's going on at a time that I'm available.
4. Send people virtual flowers, snowballs, drinks, plants, gifts, etc. I have absolutely no interest in this.
5. There is no #5.

So, once a week or so, I remember to add a status update, something along the lines of "Karen is roasting a duck" or "Karen hopes that tomorrow isn't a snow day" (and, for the record, I can't stand the forced use of the third person!). For a while, I had my Twitter status updates showing up automatically on Facebook, but it seemed to me that my replies to others on Twitter (those tweets that start with the @ symbol followed by someone's name) were too non-sequitur-ish. If someone could come up with a way to filter out the replies, I'd put my Twitter status updates back on Facebook. Update: Thanks to James, my Twitter status updates are now back on Facebook! Update to Update: After experimenting with it, I've again taken down my Twitter status updates from Facebook. For good. It's two different "audiences," and that's how it should be.

I occasionally skim the recent status updates of my "friends," and once in a while I reply to something. What I don't ever do is go back through the status history to read everything I've missed since the last time I checked in.

I set up an automated thingamabob that posts a note on Facebook every time I put up a new blog post here, with a link. That's handy, although most of my readers probably use an RSS feed aggregator like Google Reader or Bloglines to find out when I've been a-bloggin'. The upside of a feed reader is that it continues to show new blog posts until you've read them. I follow many dozens of blogs, so a feed reader is invaluable to me.

For anyone with both a blog and a Twitter account (like me), Facebook doesn't offer anything extra. And with the latest news that Facebook has quietly amended their Terms of Service such that they own everything that is posted on Facebook (photos, original writing, everything) "in perpetuity," I have even less reason to post anything worthwhile there.

So, what have we learned here?
1. Read my blog—it's filled with delightful anecdotes, delectable recipes, insightful book and movie reviews, grammar lessons, political rants, fun and interesting web links, and oh, so much more.
2. Follow me on Twitter—where you'll catch up on all the witticisms and "deep thoughts" and brief observations that didn't make it to my blog.
3. And, if you want, "friend" me over on Facebook, but don't expect to get much out of it.

Just Ducky

Andy and I finally realized what that big, gaping hole in our lives was: We couldn't remember the last time we'd made our 5-hour roast duck. The recipe is here, but I neglected to provide photos when I posted it, so here's tonight's food porn for you:

If you make this—and I strongly encourage it—be sure to serve rice or some other starch to soak up all that yummy orange sauce. This time we used the juice of blood oranges (ever seen red OJ?), but bitter Seville oranges, when in season, make a tart sauce that's a nice counterpoint to the rich duck.

If you've never made duck and are intimidated by the very idea (Hi, Amy!), rest assured that this recipe, while time-consuming, couldn't be easier. Be sure to open a big red wine to go with it.

Oh, and now I've got nearly 1¾ cups of duck fat waiting in the fridge for the next time I roast potatoes!

Small Was Big After All!

Exactly one week ago, I told you about SmallCanBeBig.com, a Boston-based charitable organization that lets you donate any amount, no matter how small, to help a needy family reach a specific goal. I started off by making a $10 donation to each of four different families that very afternoon.

A few minutes ago, I received an email saying that one of the families I chose has just reached its goal! Wow, talk about tangible evidence that I made a difference.

What if I had thought that $10 was too small of an amount to do any real good and decided not to bother? What if everyone thought that? Instead, a total of 55 donors came together to raise the $1500 that Project Hope will deliver to that family today so they can buy a car.

Now that's a Valentine's Day gift I can really feel good about.

Friday iPod Random Ten

1. My Oklahoma Home - Bruce Springsteen
2. Take Me I'm Yours - Squeeze
3. Sneaking Sally Through the Alley - Robert Palmer    
4. Shine On Harvest Moon - Leon Redbone     
5. City of New Orleans - John Prine, Randy Scruggs, Roger McGuinn
6. Lost Coastlines - Okkervil River
7. Halfway to Sydney - Dead Ringer Band
8. St. Judy's Comet - Paul Simon
9. Say Goodbye (live) - Dave Matthews Band
10. Let's Go Get Stoned (live) - Hayes Carll 

Still More Miscellany

I apologize in advance for yet another random, unfocused, cobbled-together post. I'm working on The Manuscript From Hell and am otherwise distracted. But I promise more scintillating posts in the very near future. Have I ever let you down?

1. My recent review of "Slumdog Millionaire" got picked up and translated into Spanish Italian at this site. Muy guay! Fantastico!

2. For those who occasionally glance at my sidebar: Yes, that is the same book listed under "My Book Group Is Reading..." that's been there for more than 6 months. The book group has kind of fizzled, although there's talk of reviving it. Around the time that we disbanded, a couple of members did read the Sigrid Nuñez book and found it tedious at best, so I doubt that will be the next one we do even if we re-form.

3. And, for those who continue to look at my sidebar: Scroll to the bottom and you'll see that I added a widget that shows my 5 latest Twitter updates. But really, you should just follow me on Twitter. All the cool kids are doing it.

4. I also added a "Share This" widget to the bottom of each post, should you be inclined to let the world know about any of my posts.

5. You're waiting for me to say something about those octuplets, aren't you? Well, I'm not going to. (You know exactly what I would have said, though, right?)

Can't Remember the Title of This One

You know I'm always about a month behind on my NPR stories, because I download the podcasts and listen to them in the car when I'm driving into work. Today I heard a story from January 6 about Christopher Stevens, a man who wrote a book of mnemonic devices, Thirty Days Has September: Cool Ways To Remember Stuff. (The story is worth listening to; he talks about how this book came about as a way to teach his profoundly autistic son how to learn and remember things.)

I had mnemonics on my mind anyhow, because Julie recently started taking piano lessons, so she has learned the common mnemonics for memorizing the notes (FACE, All Cows Eat Grass, etc.).

Here are some of the mnemonics I have learned and used over the years:

• Roy G. Biv for the colors in the spectrum (Red, Orange, Yellow, Green, Blue, Indigo, Violet)
• My Dirty Aunt Sally for the order of operations in arithmetic (Multiplication, Division, Addition, Subtraction)
• For spelling: i before e except after c or when sounding like a as in neighbor and weigh.
• Thirty days hath September, April, June, and November. All the rest have 31, except February, which has 28, and in Leap Year 29. (I also learned the knuckle trick.)
• Spring forward, fall backward for setting the clocks.
• I can still picture "The House of Être," which was a diagram designed to help us remember which French verbs took être instead of avoir when forming the passé composé. (At the same time we were reading Poe in English, so I ended up conflating the two into "The Fall of the House of Être.")
• Righty-tighty, lefty-loosy for screwing and unscrewing things.

Of course, the mnemonic I learned for the planets is no longer accurate! That makes me feel a wee bit ancient.

What mnemonics do you use regularly, or do you remember learning when you were a kid?

Brain Droppings

In no particular order:

1. I don't care much about Michael Phelps doing bong hits at a private party—it's not as if pot enhances athletic performance, right? I mean, I know he's supposed to be a role model, and I don't blame Frosted Flakes one bit for dumping him for that reason, but this has nothing to do with all those gold medals. But A-Rod on steroids? Sheesh. Now I can no longer consider him the greatest baseball player around, because who knows what he did on his own and what was directly attributable to the banned drugs. (And I don't think this is even the teensiest bit important enough to have asked President Obama about at his press conference last night. Puh-leeze. In other news: "President Obama!" Yes, still giddy.)

2. Why don't my iPhone and Mac show the exact same time? Aren't they both set by satellite?

3. When it comes right down to it, what's your #1 most trusted news source? Mine's NPR.

4. I recently won two more cool items in online sweepstakes; I'll share them with you when I get them in my hot little hands!

5. Papercraft fans: Check out the wicked cool projects at this Canon site. What should I make first? After I buy nice, heavy paper, that is.

40 Days Overdue

Today as I headed in to work, I noticed that I was lower on gas than I thought. I wasn't near my usual self-serve station—or any self-serve station, as far as I could tell—and I didn't like the idea of driving into town with the "refuel" light already on. So I did something I almost never do: I pulled into a full-serve station (albeit a generic one). And am I ever glad I did, because after he filled my tank, the guy said, "Are you aware that your inspection sticker expired in December?"

Um, no, I wasn't.

Interestingly enough, this is hardly the first time this has happened to me. For some reason, I am exceptionally skillful at keeping track of all the minute details of the family and my work and running the house, but I can never seem to remember to get my car inspected. I joke with Andy that I like to wait until the month after it's due so that after 12 years, I'll have saved $29. That's beating the system, eh?

Well, I'm very lucky I didn't get stopped, because the guy told me that it's not only a $50 ticket, it's also a moving violation, which ends up costing about $800 over 3 years on car insurance. So phew.

I just put an email alert in iCal for February 20, 2010: "Get car inspected!"

Legalese in the 21st Century

After the movie last night, we headed over to Legal's for a bite. (We first went to the new place in town, The Local, but there was an hour and a half wait! We'll have to try it sometime on an off hour.) I had grilled herb-marinated mahi-mahi with mushroom risotto and carrot purée. I was remembering that mahi-mahi used to be called dolphinfish, but they (they who? the dolphinfish lobby? I don't know) found that people didn't want to eat it because they thought they were eating actual dolphins (the mammal), so they adopted the Hawaiian name, mahi-mahi. Anyhow, it was delicious.

Granted, I don't get out much anymore, but I was very impressed by two hand-held devices in use at Legal's. First, our waitress (who was fun and had a great sense of humor) took our order with a stylus on a machine about the size of two iPhones. Tap-tap-tap and off our orders went to the bar and kitchen! Very cool, and much easier on the wait-staff, who now don't have to write it all down and then either bring the paper to the bar or kitchen or punch it all in at a shared computer. Then, when our meal was over, we were brought another machine, a little bigger than the first, on which we could enter the tip amount, swipe our credit card, and print out a receipt! Awesome.

Movie Night

One silver lining to the cloud of rarely going out on dates is that when we do, we usually have a ton of movies to choose from. Last night we went out for the first time in a few months and had a not-so-short list of at least a half-dozen movies we're eager to see. I really had my heart set on seeing "Slumdog Millionaire," and it was playing at a convenient time at our favorite theater (the West Newton Cinema, which shows lots of indies and foreign films and puts real butter on their popcorn!), and Andy acquiesced. It's not that he didn't want to see it, but he was in the mood for an action movie, like "Taken" or "Defiance." I prevailed this time, but I like shoot-em-ups too, so next time we can go that route.

We both really liked "Slumdog." It's on the one hand a feel-good movie that never strays from formula—or, rather, formulas, since this is both a rags-to-riches story and a love story. On the other, it's a truly distressing window onto the cruel poverty so much of India has lived in for eons. Few punches are pulled, and I did find myself covering my face a few times during the most upsetting scenes. But at other moments I was laughing and cheering, and by the end I was feeling more uplifted than not—although, to be sure, some of the most disturbing images and themes will linger with me for a long time.

I don't know much about movie-making, but something about the cinematography—which was nearly all done with hand-held cameras, due to the close quarters in the Mumbai slums—worked like magic. The editing was fast-paced and exhilarating, switching back and forth from the present to the past without causing any confusion. It must all be due to director Danny Boyle, who somehow told this story with originality and honesty but never sacrificed realism or suspense.

And, for those of you who love traditional Bollywood movies (of which this is most definitely not an example), there's a real treat for you at the end. But that's all I'll say. Go see it yourself, if you're among the last few who haven't had a chance yet or didn't think you'd like it.

Sunday Funnies

Here's a delightful video of a news-anchor team in Chicago goofing around during a commercial break:

Small Can Be Big

I recently came across the site for a Boston-based charitable organization called Small Can Be Big, whose mission is to connect donors with needy recipients in a very direct and quantifiable way. Here's how it works: The site lists specific people who need specific amounts of money in order to achieve specific goals. Anyone who wants to help can donate any amount of money (even $5, because we all know that every little bit helps) toward that cause.

For instance, a woman had her abusive husband removed from their home, but he took all their savings; she now needs $600 in back rent to prevent her and her daughters from being evicted. As of this blog post, they've received $210 toward that $600. Another example: This boy needs $2000 to buy a wheelchair as he awaits a bone marrow transplant to fight his leukemia ($316 raised so far).

And guess what? It works! Look at this example of a woman who owed $2,227 after her unpaid maternity leave—success!

I love this model of giving. So often we feel discouraged that we can't possibly make a difference, or enough of a difference, in anyone's life. Or we wonder where our donations are really going—to feed a hungry child or to an organization's operating costs? With Small Can Be Big, you could actually be the one who donated the final $10 that helped a family buy a car or get their own apartment. And, as you know, I'm all about "think globally, act locally," so I love the idea of helping people in my own community.

I'm off to find me some families to help. Hope you'll consider doing the same. Anyone know whether similar programs exist in other cities?

Update: I just made my first few donations! I was pleased to discover that all payments go through Google Checkout, so you know they're secure. Easy-peasy-lemon-squeezy, so what are you waiting for?

Fun with the Prez

We know that President Obama (Wheee! I still get giddy saying that!) smokes (and if you listened to This American Life last week, you heard the editorial staff there encourage him to continue smoking so that he won't seem too perfect). Well, now we can also hear him swear like a motherfucker (granted, he's reading aloud from his book in another person's voice, but still)! And he also throws snowballs. (By the way, you can see these photos all over the web, with a third frame inserted suggesting that he has thrown the snow at a child, a cat, etc. They're all hoaxes—but you're smart enough to have figured that out on your own, right?)

Friday iPod Random Ten

1. Mississippi and Me - Kate Campbell
2. Wish We Were Back in Missouri - Emmylou Harris
3. Thanks a Lot - Eilen Jewell
4. We're All in This Together - Old Crow Medicine Show
5. Walking Down to Casey's - Greg Brown
6. Walking Man (live) - James Taylor
7. Black Sheep (live) - Martin Sexton
8. Voodoo Woman (live) - Susan Tedeschi
9. You Can't Always Get What You Want - The Rolling Stones 
10. Miss the Mississippi and You - Doc Watson

I kinda like the "Mississippi" bookends on this list (with a "Missouri" in the middle).

Friday Fill-Ins

1. Please don't tell me off in the comments and then leave a phony email address.

2. Can you even make a fist in the morning? I can't.

3. The color _____ makes me want to _____! I can't even come up with something reasonably plausible for this one. I don't think I respond to colors in any particular way. Do you?

4. I have a craving for something salty. Hello, Fritos!

5. If my life had a pause button, I'd pause it during one of those rare moments when I'm feeling relaxed and everyone around me seems happy.

6. Eyes are the most precious parts of our bodies.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to a relaxing evening at home, tomorrow my plans include going out on a long-overdue date, and Sunday, I want to enjoy the predicted warmer weather (40s).

Go Away, Mean People!

I usually get somewhere around 300 visitors to my blog each day, some of whom are regular visitors, some came here by way of a Google search, some followed a link from elsewhere, etc. Every now and then one of my posts gets linked somewhere that sends me many hundreds of visitors in addition to the usual amount. That has happened today from my Walgreens post, which appeared on an AOL financial site. (Although it's strange, because some of the extra hits come from that source but many others come from some unknown source. I haven't quite figured that one out yet.)

All of a sudden I'm getting nasty comments, suggesting that I think I am more important than everyone else, that I'm impatient, that I lack education, that I'm "wicked," that I imagine the world revolves around me, etc. At first I thought maybe they were disgruntled pharmacists, but that doesn't seem likely. I'm guessing that these comments come from angry Walgreens stockholders or board members. I always do my best to respond civilly (more civilly than their comments warrant, that's for sure!) to each, both in the comments and via email. I have no problem disagreeing with someone over an issue, but when people get downright mean ("I'm glad you got screwed by Walgreens," for instance), I just don't get it. I can't imagine wishing ill on a complete stranger.

Anyone who knows me—either in real life or online—knows that none of these accusations could possibly be true, and of course I'm aware that these commenters are just knee-jerking a response to somehow bolster their own self-opinion or allay their fears. But it still makes me feel bad, because in my heart I truly believe that most people are kind and decent, and this kind of behavior provides contrary evidence.

Eye'm OK

First the dermatologist mentioned that if this shingle or zoster or whatever it is started creeping toward my eyebrow, I should go see an ophthalmologist immediately. Next DJay left a comment warning me (gently) about how it can indeed be a very bad complication if this virus gets in the optic nerve. Then I started fretting about how the area around my eye and eyebrow were still quite tender and puffy. So I called my beloved ophthalmologist, Romeo Chang, and he agreed to squeeze me in today.

He examined me completely and said my eye is fine. He said that if I got another one of these things on the tip of my nose, I'd be in big trouble, because that would mean the virus had gone from my forehead, through my eye, to my nose. He said that it's been enough days since the first (only) one showed up to make him 99% sure I'm in the clear, but to come see him immediately if I get one on my nose.

Phew. I don't mess around with eyes.

In Other News

- Add to that list of home repairs in January these two for February: garage door, $100; fridge, $245. Yup, that's $1000 of unexpected expenses so far in 2009. Yup.

- Watch this delightful stop-motion animation video.

- Remember those special-order cakes with all the typos (frostos?) that I posted a while back? (Sorry, I can't seem to find the link.) Here's a doozy, which serves as a good reason not to give the bakery a photo on your flash drive.

- Love these Obamicons, especially Obama Marley and Alfred E. Obama.

Walgreens Continues to Suck

I forgot to tell you about the most fun part of yesterday's lovely diagnosis day: the trip to Walgreens! I've mentioned before that the only reason I get prescriptions filled at Walgreens is that it's the closest pharmacy to my house. I hate Walgreens. This particular one feels dirty, and the cashiers don't seem to have ten IQ points (or teeth) among them all. Oh, and the manager is a jerk. But—and this is a big but—the pharmacy staff has always impressed me by being helpful, cooperative, and smart. Up until yesterday.

After my appointment with Doogie Howser, I went to Walgreens to drop off my prescription. I was told it would be ready in 15 minutes, so I said I was going to run across the street to Whole Foods and would come back to pick it up. So I did. I came back more like 25–30 minutes later, and surprise! My prescription was not ready. The guy at the counter said, "It'll be ready in 15 minutes." He was messing with the wrong shingle-lady that day; I shot back, "No. That's what I was told 30 minutes ago." He got flustered and did some random keystrokes on the computer and came back to say that it wasn't ready and he was sorry. Instead of walking away, I just stood there the whole time, while he waited on other customers. I couldn't help noticing that he was sneezing every 30 seconds and not washing his hands or anything. Finally my prescription was ready, I paid ($45 after insurance!), and I left.

I got home and went to take my first pill. Wow, but these are enormous pills! I have no idea why, but I like taking pills, so this isn't a problem, but hoo-ee. I don't think Andy would be able to take these (he has a bit of a pill-swallowing issue). So I start wondering how they fit 21 pills in that little bottle. (At the doctor's office, I went over the prescription with him, confirming that I would be taking 1 pill 3 times a day for 7 days, for a total of 21 pills.) Well, they didn't. There were only 15. I looked at the info sheet, and sure enough, it said, "15/21" and said I could get a "partial refill." I stomped over to the phone and called Walgreens. I explained that I'd just been there to get my prescription and was surprised to find that I wasn't given my full amount. The pharmacist looked up my records and said that they had run out and were expecting more to come in today. I said that they should have told me that I was given only a partial amount. What if I didn't know I was supposed to have 7 days' worth? I would've finished the bottle and gone on my merry way. She said that the guy who rang it up was in training and didn't know. I said that he should be supervised if he doesn't know, and I added that he should use Purell every single time he sneezes.

I waited all day today for a call to tell me that the rest of my prescription was in, but of course it didn't come. Which means that if I didn't already know I was owed 6 more pills, I still wouldn't know. Boy are they going to get a(nother) piece of my mind when I go in there tomorrow. And I think this might very well be the last prescription I fill there, convenient location or no. CVS, here I come. (But not that CVS, of course.)

Update (2/6/09): I've decided to close off comments for this blog post. A whole bunch of nasty folks from AOL (who all happen to display a stunning gap in their knowledge of basic spelling and punctuation rules) keep writing in to suggest that I'm a bad person because I expect decent customer service. It's getting tedious to continue replying to them. As you know, I never shy away from a well-reasoned debate, but these folks just want to snipe and run (some even leave phony email addresses). Oh, and for the record, I picked up the remainder of my prescription today, but I won't go back to Walgreens again. Not ever.

Putting the Ick in Sick

When I was pregnant the first time, I wished I'd married an OB-GYN. I had so many questions and concerns, and I wanted to be hooked up 24/7 to that Doppler machine so I could listen to Steph's heartbeat. Then, after she was born, I decided I should've married a pediatrician, because I had a question every hour about whether this was normal, should I be worried about that, etc. Now, as I'm getting older, I'm realizing that the ideal doctor to have married would have been a dermatologist. What the heck is that? Do I need to worry about this?

On Saturday I noticed a tiny spot of discomfort on my forehead—something between itchy and ouchy. (It might have even been late Friday, before I was really aware of noticing it.) It got bigger, about the size of a quarter, and even more painful. I mean really, really painful—I could barely stand to have a wisp of hair brush against it. It looked very angry and red and consisted of a series of bumps. By Sunday evening I was convinced I'd either gotten bitten repeatedly by some horrible insect or managed to get a very well-contained rash. It also felt very prickly, almost like a stinging feeling. Finally yesterday I called my new dermatologist (who is very nice but looks to be about 11 years old) and he happened to have a cancellation this morning.

Well, it turns out that I have something in the herpes family, possibly even shingles! Which explains why it's so incredibly painful—I've heard that about shingles. He said that shingles looks exactly like the more ordinary form of herpes ("Not that kind of herpes," he was quick to assure me, gesturing toward my lap), so this is like a cold sore but on my forehead. He said the same drug (Valtrex) is used for both, but he gave me a stronger dose in case it is shingles. He called it "one of the safest drugs on the planet" and said that it's even given to pregnant women and children. He also gave me a topical cortisone ointment.

While I was there, I thought to ask him about another new weird thing I'd noticed yesterday, a lump near my ear, which turned out to be related! It's a lymph node trying to do its job and get rid of this virus. I went even farther out on that limb and mentioned that I'd had a headache for 3 days, and he said that was absolutely part of this virus too. I love when things have an explanation.

He said that I should call him if I get a fever, if it starts to creep downward toward my eye, or if it's not better after 7 days of meds.

I'll Take a Case, Please

Tired of arguing with complete morons? Simply hand one of these cards to the asshole in question and walk away:

Problem solved. ($5 for a pack of 25, which you know won't be enough.)

Supplemental Information

Do you take daily supplements? Me neither. Yeah, right—I take 'em by the handful.

In the morning I take a multivitamin (in case my diet doesn't contain enough, um, lutein and lycopene), a B-complex (I can't remember why I started that one, but I think it was to counteract stress and alcohol), 2 calcium citrate with vitamin D (to ward off osteoporosis), a fish oil (supposedly does a lot of good things; I forget exactly what), a probiotic (to help the good guys beat the bad guys in the battle of gut bacteria), 2 fiber (to keep me "regular"), and a cranberry extract (to prevent UTIs); at bedtime I take a milk thistle (to help with secondary insomnia) and 2 more calcium citrate with Vitamin D (since it's absorbed better in separate doses).

All Systems Are Stop

Does your house occasionally go through phases where everything falls apart at the same time? It seems I can go months without needing to call any kind of repairman, then all of a sudden, wham! (I think you can guess what's coming.)

2009 has already seen the dishwasher repairman twice (once to replace an internal fuse that died, $110; once to replace the broken latch that he'd diagnosed and ordered the first time, $110), the plumber for a completely blocked shower drain that even my master-blaster couldn't get to ($115), and the Roto Rooter guy to ream out the sewer line since it seems to back up every two years and we are nearing that mark ($300). (Granted, that last one was preventive care, but it's worth it to me to avoid another sewer backup.)

On Friday, the fridge decided it was time to pull its old trick of getting the (non-user-accessible) fan clogged with ice again, so I have to make that repair call tomorrow—thank heavens we still have our old dependable fridge in the basement (the one that has never broken down but didn't fit properly in this house's kitchen). Also on Friday, Andy's garage door pulley system went off its track, so we have that repair bill to look forward to this week also.

And, on top of all this, the door to the only downstairs bathroom is broken again—after we spent $830 just about a year ago to have a carpenter fix it. Because the bathroom is so tiny, it has this ridiculous sliding-door situation; when it falls off its track, we have to take the whole wall down. But we won't think about that today, will we?